Hello :o)
I am in Birmingham. Its my Auntie Pat's birthday tomorrow, she will be 80. She is not to happy at the thought of being 80 years old, 'how can someone be that old' she asked me earlier today as we were talking about all the years that have passed. But what a wonderful long and happy life you've had - it doesn't take much to get me to start the reminscing - and its true she has had a happy life. I'm not saying its all been easy, because it hasn't, but considering all factors it has been happy. She has been married to the same man she met when she was 16 years old, had two sons and has worked hard all her life. Family are very important to her and have always come first. I remember as a child when she and my uncle and cousins would come to stay with us during the summer holidays the fun we would have. She loved her sisters children as if they were her own, and as we have grown up and had children of our own, she has always remembered thier birthdays too. Auntie Pat has always been such fun to be with and she still is today, she may be a bit slower, she may have a few more wrinkles on her face but she is just as much fun. Tomorrow is going to be a lovely day, full of laughter, happy faces, smiles, lots of good wishes, people dropping by to wish her Happy Birthday - i can't wait for the party to start !
Speaky soon :o)
Monday, 10 May 2010
Wednesday, 28 April 2010
Hello :o)
Well whoever said 'love never runs smoothly' knew what they were talking about as Stu and i have made up.....yay! I love being 'luved up' ;o) Thanks for your advice and comments guys you were my Marge Proops when i needed you :o)
Life at The Cove is fab, flatmate and i are like 50 year old teenagers......hehee....... on reflection life is pretty good just now, if only i could get my knees sorted out and it would be perfect!
The weekend starts with a gathering of friends down at Blue on a friday evening, we are hoping this will turn into barbies on the beach once the warmer weather gets here. But as it is we can sit outside Blue until about 7.30pm when it starts to get chilly........Cornwall's north coast has some spectacular sunsets and i hope to be showing you some of them 'here' very soon.
Speaky soon :o)
Well whoever said 'love never runs smoothly' knew what they were talking about as Stu and i have made up.....yay! I love being 'luved up' ;o) Thanks for your advice and comments guys you were my Marge Proops when i needed you :o)
Life at The Cove is fab, flatmate and i are like 50 year old teenagers......hehee....... on reflection life is pretty good just now, if only i could get my knees sorted out and it would be perfect!
The weekend starts with a gathering of friends down at Blue on a friday evening, we are hoping this will turn into barbies on the beach once the warmer weather gets here. But as it is we can sit outside Blue until about 7.30pm when it starts to get chilly........Cornwall's north coast has some spectacular sunsets and i hope to be showing you some of them 'here' very soon.
Speaky soon :o)
Thursday, 15 April 2010
Hi,
I miss him, i feel empty and quiet, i don't want to laugh, i want to sit and cry, i'm hurting.
I can't ever remember feeling this way over a man.
I keep thinking over what happened ..... it was something and nothing....... should i contact him, tell him i love him, that i want him........but if he really loves me won't he call me and tell me that ?! Are we both being stubborn.
We've had little tiffs over his issues before and i have always been the one to make up afterwards, to tell him i love him, to tell him how wonderful he is and that i would never hurt him. If i call him now, it will always be my role to be peace maker, and as much as i love him i don't know that i can do that.
I hate feeling like this.......... it hurts.
Wednesday, 14 April 2010
Hello :o)
I have to tell you all how i feel....... hurt, let down, bruised, betrayed, hurt and more hurt..... just when i thought my life was going somewhere, that it had meaning again, i was so happy ...... i should have realised that real happiness and me don't go together. (woe me....lol) .... Stuart came into my life bringing with him all the happiness my heart could hold, it was wonderful, i loved him and every time we met i fell a little bit more in love with him. This was the man i wanted to spend the rest of my life with......in my silly moments i even tried his surname on for size..... Mrs Jayne B........ it sounded wonderful.
Now all that happiness has burst.........gone...........all the things he said to me, whispered in my ear during tender moments........the way he made me giggle, his kisses, his impromptu little gifts, his silly jokes......all gone...........
Its over, things have been said and there is no going back. Another chapter of life closed.
Speaky soon X
I have to tell you all how i feel....... hurt, let down, bruised, betrayed, hurt and more hurt..... just when i thought my life was going somewhere, that it had meaning again, i was so happy ...... i should have realised that real happiness and me don't go together. (woe me....lol) .... Stuart came into my life bringing with him all the happiness my heart could hold, it was wonderful, i loved him and every time we met i fell a little bit more in love with him. This was the man i wanted to spend the rest of my life with......in my silly moments i even tried his surname on for size..... Mrs Jayne B........ it sounded wonderful.
Now all that happiness has burst.........gone...........all the things he said to me, whispered in my ear during tender moments........the way he made me giggle, his kisses, his impromptu little gifts, his silly jokes......all gone...........
Its over, things have been said and there is no going back. Another chapter of life closed.
Speaky soon X
Tuesday, 16 February 2010
Hello :o)
I have moved...... again ! I was all nice and snug in my little pad by the sea and then a friend persuaded me to share with her and so we have moved into a lovely flat with sea views and yes i have the room with the en suite - it feels like i am staying in a hotel every night ....(giggles). I am sure life is going to be so much fun now and i hate to think of the adventures we will get up to.
Stuart surprised me with an impromtu visit this weekend.........well we just had to be 'together' for our first real Valentines day didn't we. Saturday evening there was a knock on the door, Sandra got up to see who it was, 'i hope its not for me' i said 'i'm too shattered to go out'......few seconds later Sandra says 'it is for you'.......'who' ? 'go and see' she said. Standing at the door was Stuart with a huge red heart shaped balloon and a Teddy just as huge ...... i love him so much (giggles)..... we had a fabulous weekend and there were tears at departure time on Monday evening.
Speaky soon :o)
I have moved...... again ! I was all nice and snug in my little pad by the sea and then a friend persuaded me to share with her and so we have moved into a lovely flat with sea views and yes i have the room with the en suite - it feels like i am staying in a hotel every night ....(giggles). I am sure life is going to be so much fun now and i hate to think of the adventures we will get up to.
Stuart surprised me with an impromtu visit this weekend.........well we just had to be 'together' for our first real Valentines day didn't we. Saturday evening there was a knock on the door, Sandra got up to see who it was, 'i hope its not for me' i said 'i'm too shattered to go out'......few seconds later Sandra says 'it is for you'.......'who' ? 'go and see' she said. Standing at the door was Stuart with a huge red heart shaped balloon and a Teddy just as huge ...... i love him so much (giggles)..... we had a fabulous weekend and there were tears at departure time on Monday evening.
Speaky soon :o)
Monday, 11 January 2010
Time
Hello :o)
I cannot believe we are at the start of yet another decade. What makes the years go so fast ? I retire in the year 2022 and that is scarily not that far away. My mind wanders to that year and tries to imagine what i will look like, how physically fit will i be and what will my financial status be?
I want a good retirement, whatever i am able to afford i want it to be fun. Its all just twelve years away ...... oh my goodness, twelve years. I am more than halfway thru my life........my mortality is getting closer. I think of the generations of family above me that have all passed on including my parents and life feels so short, i also think of time past and how much of it i have wasted or frittered away and how i thought there was plenty of time, but there is never plenty of time, i realise this now i am older.
What do you believe in ? i believe there is another life after this one, and hopefully several more after that one. I just cannot believe we go thru this life experiencing so much for there not to be something at the end of it - it would be so pointless. De ja Vue ? flashbacks of a previous life, your brain trying to tell you something about your previous life or maybe even a future life. I don't know, it hurts to much to think about it (laughs).
Life is exciting, every day is exciting, not knowing what the day has in store for you is exciting, i feel happy and full of hope every day - ok, so some days this feeling hides itself, but its never far from the surface. It feels good to be alive and i feel lucky to have a roof over my head, a job and some money in my purse, to have good friends who care. Friendships are so important, and you have to nurture, encourage and show love to make them grow. I wish i lived nearer to all my brothers, i miss them and think of them and when we were kids, how close we were, how we liked to play and how our parents encouraged us to love each other. That feels like a lifetime ago - and now my brothers have children of their own, and those children are just reaching the age of 30 who have children of their own - life repeating itself.
So here i am, my 53rd Birthday just months away from me. Some people have complied a tick list of what they wish to achieve by the time they are 50. I have no such list, i guess i could write one, 'Things i wish to have done by the time i am 60' ........ Hmmmm.... i've always wanted to see the sunrise at Stonehenge, i'd like to go to 'Glastonbury Fest', even to see the Great Wall of China would be fab and i guess if i put my mind to it i could come up with lots of weird and wonderful things, but the truth is i do not have a passion or a fire inside me that drives me to achieve these things. I am contented. I have never really been driven to strive for anything or felt such passion to achieve. I do have a passion for friends and family and life, this passion was shown to me by my parents, i've never stepped outside the box to expect more, i have always known what was obtainable and to be happy with this. Does that sound too simple ? Life is not complicated and i like the saying 'life is what you make it' it is exactly that. We are in control, i am in control, this is my life it will be whatever i choose it to be within the realms of realism.
2010 has two new beginnings for me. I have fallen deeply in love with Stuart. We met about 8 years ago, we became friends, i never imagined then that i would love him this much. My other new beginning is another move, but only up the road, another new home which i will be sharing with my friend Sandra. She says we will be like the 'golden girls' (giggling) this has just got to be experienced to be believed (giggles). I am looking forward to the year ahead, it will be whatever i choose it to be.
Speaky soon :o)
I cannot believe we are at the start of yet another decade. What makes the years go so fast ? I retire in the year 2022 and that is scarily not that far away. My mind wanders to that year and tries to imagine what i will look like, how physically fit will i be and what will my financial status be?
I want a good retirement, whatever i am able to afford i want it to be fun. Its all just twelve years away ...... oh my goodness, twelve years. I am more than halfway thru my life........my mortality is getting closer. I think of the generations of family above me that have all passed on including my parents and life feels so short, i also think of time past and how much of it i have wasted or frittered away and how i thought there was plenty of time, but there is never plenty of time, i realise this now i am older.
What do you believe in ? i believe there is another life after this one, and hopefully several more after that one. I just cannot believe we go thru this life experiencing so much for there not to be something at the end of it - it would be so pointless. De ja Vue ? flashbacks of a previous life, your brain trying to tell you something about your previous life or maybe even a future life. I don't know, it hurts to much to think about it (laughs).
Life is exciting, every day is exciting, not knowing what the day has in store for you is exciting, i feel happy and full of hope every day - ok, so some days this feeling hides itself, but its never far from the surface. It feels good to be alive and i feel lucky to have a roof over my head, a job and some money in my purse, to have good friends who care. Friendships are so important, and you have to nurture, encourage and show love to make them grow. I wish i lived nearer to all my brothers, i miss them and think of them and when we were kids, how close we were, how we liked to play and how our parents encouraged us to love each other. That feels like a lifetime ago - and now my brothers have children of their own, and those children are just reaching the age of 30 who have children of their own - life repeating itself.
So here i am, my 53rd Birthday just months away from me. Some people have complied a tick list of what they wish to achieve by the time they are 50. I have no such list, i guess i could write one, 'Things i wish to have done by the time i am 60' ........ Hmmmm.... i've always wanted to see the sunrise at Stonehenge, i'd like to go to 'Glastonbury Fest', even to see the Great Wall of China would be fab and i guess if i put my mind to it i could come up with lots of weird and wonderful things, but the truth is i do not have a passion or a fire inside me that drives me to achieve these things. I am contented. I have never really been driven to strive for anything or felt such passion to achieve. I do have a passion for friends and family and life, this passion was shown to me by my parents, i've never stepped outside the box to expect more, i have always known what was obtainable and to be happy with this. Does that sound too simple ? Life is not complicated and i like the saying 'life is what you make it' it is exactly that. We are in control, i am in control, this is my life it will be whatever i choose it to be within the realms of realism.
2010 has two new beginnings for me. I have fallen deeply in love with Stuart. We met about 8 years ago, we became friends, i never imagined then that i would love him this much. My other new beginning is another move, but only up the road, another new home which i will be sharing with my friend Sandra. She says we will be like the 'golden girls' (giggling) this has just got to be experienced to be believed (giggles). I am looking forward to the year ahead, it will be whatever i choose it to be.
Speaky soon :o)
Thursday, 31 December 2009
Goodbye 2009
Hello :o)
2009 was a year of moving on - it is now three years since my Mum passed away. Its been difficult adjusting to life without her. My life will never be the same and i have learnt to accept that now and realise that life is still good but in a different kind of way. I moved into my lovely little flat by the sea at the end of March and have been so happy there (tho i am thinking of moving - more news on that soon). I have felt more energised this year, holding my head high with a spring in my step, or as much as i can spring with these dodgy knees of mine. I've keyhole surgery that only marginally improved my mobility which is very severe. I had a wonderful 2 week holiday with my step mother who came to stay in June. And then Stuart came back into my life in August and i feel so happy and it is with this new found happiness that i look forward to 2010.
To all my fellow bloggers, thank you for your friendship and comments. One of my new years resolutions is to have a 'correspondence' evening each week and to re establish my blogging too. I enjoy it so much, both writing and reading others. Happy New Year to you all, i hope this is the start of a wonderful decade.
Big Love
Jaynee X
2009 was a year of moving on - it is now three years since my Mum passed away. Its been difficult adjusting to life without her. My life will never be the same and i have learnt to accept that now and realise that life is still good but in a different kind of way. I moved into my lovely little flat by the sea at the end of March and have been so happy there (tho i am thinking of moving - more news on that soon). I have felt more energised this year, holding my head high with a spring in my step, or as much as i can spring with these dodgy knees of mine. I've keyhole surgery that only marginally improved my mobility which is very severe. I had a wonderful 2 week holiday with my step mother who came to stay in June. And then Stuart came back into my life in August and i feel so happy and it is with this new found happiness that i look forward to 2010.
To all my fellow bloggers, thank you for your friendship and comments. One of my new years resolutions is to have a 'correspondence' evening each week and to re establish my blogging too. I enjoy it so much, both writing and reading others. Happy New Year to you all, i hope this is the start of a wonderful decade.
Big Love
Jaynee X
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